Wednesday, August 20, 2014

what to call it


Most people tiptoe around the word "divorce" like it will summon an evil spirit. However some people have a refreshing sense of honesty, they say the word divorce like any other word. At first it didn't really bother me that nobody would say it in front of me, they would only say it behind my back when they were gossiping about everything that was going on in my family (yes I could hear you) when they had just as many problems with theirs. I know that some of you most likely think I am over reacting over the whole deal, but for me it's just one of those things. Same goes for any other things that they may call it, separation, taking a break, living apart, or working on things. I was looking around on some other blogs yesterday that also talked about divorce. The whole thing that made me start thinking about this again was realizing that as I was reading all these blogs all of them never said one word - divorce.
Everyone called it "the big D" not only does  it only take longer to say it also just means that people are sometimes afraid to how kids will react if they say divorce. My opinion- while other people might think that it is easier for you to hear it that way I found that in the end it didn't really help me. Honestly I guess it just depends on you and what you like hearing people say. 

If you know of anything else that annoys you about the whole situation 
please write about it in the comments 

thanks for reading, 

Monday, August 18, 2014


Now it all depends on your situation,however
sometimes kids in the middle of a divorce find themselves moving.I did. Now if your moving next door, or across the country it doesn't matter. It could just mean you have to stay there part time or full time. The best person to ask is your parents, They will be the ones who know most about your
situation. There are a couple of things that you will have to deal with. The first thing is emotional moving and physical moving.I have moved twice due to the divorce. Once was in the same neighborhood, two streets away. Later I moved all the way across the country. For these two moves I have developed a system to keep everything in order, also to make sure that you don't lose it. 

Emotional Moving- It's hard to accept moving. It means not always having both of your parents in the same house when you need them. Keep in mind they are only a phone call away. I figured that depending on if you are changing schools,moving away from your friends,or more things that require many goodbyes; that you try and not think of how your life will change. I can pretty much tell you that everything is going to change in someway during the whole separation. I think that definitely the hardest thing for me was knowing that my spot had been taken at my old school,that my friends would move on. Also it hurt deep down that kids I had gone to school with since kindergarten will barely think twice about me leaving. It has definitely helped me to keep in touch with all of my old friends over social media and visiting them when I go back. There is no better feeling than going to your old school and having all your friends rush towards you, but there are still those kids who just walk right by you. The last and final thing is if you have social media apps that you use to stay in touch with your friends it can be a blessing and a curse. The blessing was that I had the chance to see what my friends were up to, the curse was that I could see them moving on without me. My advice: don't think to much about it.

Physical Moving- Now it all depends on your situation, whether you change houses once a year,a month,or a week. Obviously you should have the essentials at each house, but it's 
the things like your clothes that you really like,or your favorite game. These next few steps are for helping you to remember and know what to bring.

  • clothing 
  • shoes 
  • favorite games 
  • electronics and their chargers 
  • school work- notes  
Remember if you are going to be going to school while at the other house.

  • lunchbox 
  • backpack 
  • textbooks
  • notes 
  • homework 
  • uniform- if needed
If there is anything that you think that should be on this list please let me know in the comments.

Thanks for reading

Saturday, August 16, 2014

Who to talk to

                                                              When my parents were getting a divorce all the people close to us started asking about everything, most of the things they were asking were things that I didn't even know myself. I felt like a wave was going over my head and I was going to drown. I felt like I just needed to talk to someone. I'm sure that you have great friends, some friends just aren't listeners. Those are the friends that you can count on to put a smile on your face. It just  might mean that someone else might be better to talk to. You can turn to your parents too, but sense they might be causing some of the tension a family friend may be the better option. When talking to the person that you feel comfortable talking to try to talk to them regularly instead of just dumping everything on them at once. I know that this is very overwhelming at first, just don't keep all your feelings inside. Remember you have a choice as to who you want to talk to about it, and if you don't want to tell anyone new try talking about it with a sibling.


Siblings can be one of the best people to talk to about these things. Cause guess what they are most likely going through the exact same thing.The thing about siblings is they may not want to talk about it with you because they are coping with it in a different way and may not want to talk about with you.If they don't feel like talking to you about it just give them space to think about and deal with it in your own way.


Your parents are also good people to talk to. I found myself often getting frustrated though because I had so many questions that they didn't have all the answers.I'm not going to lie I never talked to my parents about it that much except for when I had questions. However if you feel like that would be the person who you trust the most you should always try talking to them.


During my parents divorce my cat,Samantha was really and truly my best friend.I could tell her anything and she would just listen. Some people may argue that this might not be the "healthiest" approach,but it helped me to cope to just tell tell her all my feelings and fears. if you don't happen to have a pet try talking to to a stuffed animal.Who cares, if you think it will help you: talk to a tree.